Guest Blog from Former Life Coach of the Year Charlotta Hughes
New Year’s Resolutions. We do them every year. And for most, they read pretty similar year on year…because we never reach those dream destinations! So, they’re in effect still available to dream about every New Year’s Eve. And to be frustrated about by the time February hits!
The determination and conviction that this year will be different that we feel after a few glasses of champagne on New Year’s Eve soon disappears into the busyness of everyday life that invariably returns early in January. Unwittingly we repeat the same mistakes year after year.
So often the change we desire is around our career – whether it’s getting the pay rise we deserve, the promotion we’ve worked hard for or landing the dream job. And of course, we spend such a vast amount of time at work, that we really can’t afford to ignore our dreams!
The good news is that, by realising what the common mistakes we make are, we are able to take the control back and stop them before they hit! Read on to ensure your 2019 success!
- Accept every day life will return soon into the New Year. When you return to work, when the kids go back to school, when normality and its busyness hits…. We can’t remain on the cloud of dreams and possibilities that we enjoy so much on New Year’s Eve forever. This, if dealt will well, is a really good thing. Because it’s only when we step off the cloud and start to realise the changes we desire in our real life, that our dreams really can come true.
- Have clarity on what you want. Far too often we are too vague in our New Year’s Resolutions. We tell ourselves things like ‘this year will be great’, ‘I’ll make real improvements’, ‘I’ll contribute more at work.’ The problem with statements like these is that they’re far too vague. What does better, improvements and fun look like for you? If you don’t know exactly what your dream or vision looks like, you’re very unlikely to get to it.
- Develop a plan on how to get to your dream. What decisions have to be made, what actions do you need to take as well as what you need to feel able to do, express and feel in order to reach them. Try to steer off any thoughts on the how. That’s when people commonly get stuck. You realise you need to be more assertive, sell yourself confidently, feel able to ask for what you want, start applying for jobs…. but as soon as you identify a what you counter that with looking for the how. And because this is new territory for you, you don’t immediately know the answer and then you let go of the dream, distracting yourself with your every day busyness. Just like last year. Sounds familiar? So… stay focused on the what. There’s plenty of time to figure out the how later.
- Accept that no goal was ever achieved in a linear fashion. You’re most vulnerable of giving up on your New Year’s resolutions when you have a set back. So perhaps you somehow missed the deadline for a job you felt perfect for or an interview turned out to be a nightmare. Instead of losing momentum and giving up, tell yourself that a slip doesn’t need to become a fall. Instead, tell yourself ‘this was my wake-up call’. Consider what led up to the slip, learn from it and get back on track with a forward focus.
- Add accountability. The easiest person in the world to let down is yourself. If only you know that you’re meant to be presenting a new idea to your boss, updating your CV, applying for at least three jobs a week, identifying a course to develop a certain skill, or whatever the case is, there’s no real pain attached to not doing it. You’ve not lost face. The problem is, the only person it actually pains, is (da da!) you! So avoid this by telling someone. Someone who will hold you accountable and that the pain of admitting your failings to would be greater than the pain of doing ‘it’.
- Add fun to your vision. If your goal is too boring, you’re unlikely to stick with it, however much you know you want it. So you know you want a new job and you may be clear on quite a bit of the detail around the type of organisation, the department and sector you want it to be in, but also make sure you include the positive feelings you’ll enjoy once you have accomplished it. However attractive a new job would be, it can sound a bit uninspired on its own. Or a bit too daunting to push through and go for it! Expressing the great benefits of having achieved it will make a huge difference. And maybe even reward yourself along the way, at set milestones, as well as at the goal completion.
Now allow your awareness of these ‘road kinks’ to prevent them from turning into roadblocks and achieve your career dream!
Charlotta Hughes is an award-winning life coach, published author and speaker. She is the Associate Career Coach with The I Am Group and, if you’d like to explore how life coaching could benefit you, she offers our job-seekers a free consultation and a complimentary copy of her book “What’s Your Excuse for Not Being More Confident?” to anyone who signs up for one of her coaching programmes.